Copyright (C) (1989-2008) by Glen Fullmer Phoenix, AZ Oct 2, 2008 All dripping dusty sweat while huffing, I watch her smooth no-nonsense legs attack the hill. Gladness fills my soul as she accepts me as a hiking buddy. This long swishing hair hiking beauty sways in front of me with possibilities, swaying my mind with excitement. Shy at first, revealing a delightful soul, witty humor, sarcastic at times, not suffering fools lightly, but a kind soul, too. Needing to know what makes her tick seems my life mission for a time as I follow her up the hill. Oh how I would love her smooth satin skin against mine, like every cell stroking and caressing and caring. Her moans of delight fill the air as she attacks the hill and enhances my body into a thankful, loving, hot, hiking machine. We reach the top and she pauses and reflects to savor the moment and the view on the horizon. Not done yet she swishes her way down from the top only to give me pleasure as she takes the lead me watching her experienced, exotic-like, hiking moves. Slowly at first and then onto a pace with which my body and mind explode trying to keep up. We reach the end of the trail and relax in exhaustion. Hiking is so much fun especially with her. Phoenix, AZ Saturday, March 8th, 2008 Longing between twice weekly visits Light from your smile lights my heart At times you reveal yourself openly in understanding, wisdom and caring Other times your mystery abounds Nice mix, creates intriguing interest Sensitivity you lack none Your mother's gone, you still weep You know how to treat your friends Slow to anger, seldom so, then resolved quickly Socially understanding is yours You navigate human interaction well Precious friend, good woman you are admired and respected You put up with the dirty exterior of souls who you know deep down can be good You help more than you know and are not repaid enough Still through it all your face lights all those who see it You hold my heart in your hand and maybe I yours in mine You are strong willed but not stubborn You are a light in a dark world You are my best friend May your life be as fantastic as mine in knowing you Thanks for being! NOL 26 May 2006 I'm happy for your love of life your grace and poise your sensuality your honesty your beauty your sense of humor your body your lack of decorum your lack of dinginess your mother your practicality your sensitivity our meeting our inspiration to pursue our relationship further our mutual feelings our similarities our differences our possibilities You inspire me by raising the expectations of our possibilities together to think to love to dream to work to have patience to write poetry I wonder are we falling in love with love what will come what will be will we be together after 20 years do you want children will we have children, adopted or otherwise can 156 per year be enough can we wait for the first time My spirit says moment by moment a day at a time take no thought for tomorrow live now as the past is done and the future never comes what will be, will be When are lives are done, can we say the candle was worth the flame the flame was worth the wax we helped each other become better people our relationship made the world a better place if we had the choice to do what we did, WOULD WE DO IT AGAIN? 21 Aug 1989 Concord and Boston Stubborn beauty steals unsuspecting heart Voluptuous elegance 12 years = 144 months = 4383 days = 105,192 hours = 6,311,520 minutes = 378,691,200 seconds! What's one third of a billion seconds among friends? A long time ago, in a space far away, flashing neurons remember: pain removed Amazed at how much they retain like sponges, little electro-chemical sponges freezing time. Miracles occur in simple ways Amazed at the possibilities Given the past: Present constrained, yes Determined, no A third of a billion Seconds in the now-time-space gone But recovered dimly by neuron squeezing and sponge electronics Concord, Evening Alcott sat where I sit tonight writing her "Little Women" The Hawthorne Inn smells of history, the thing that time is made of Hawthorne, Longfellow, and others walked this land Not far away A shot rings out A British Soldier dies and freedom's fight begins Holy freedom Precious Jewel Starts here 200 years ago I have missed you as much as a Colonial warrior longs for freedom's touch; I long for yours Concord, 22 Aug 89 It's morning shining bright through open portals of ancient windows of light Invigorating morning run to the bridge where that Freedom's shot abruptly stopped in a Royal Soldiers flesh Stomach turns as the bullet makes it presence known Now in empathy Two hundred years ago in reality Oh precious price, freedom. Boston 24 August 1989 Take the Sun Eat the Monday in the afternoon Over the Moon Drink lunar eclipse Thursday - Drunken Fool Slow down wanderer Slow down Clear the air Smoke it clean Drink the stars of yesterday's loves Drink the nectar of tomorrow's today Take some time to tell me now Feelings felt Smooth felt Crinkly lace Straight laced lady Long nosed beauty Legs longer still Move elegantly Across paths crossing again Railroad tracks cross too Two at once Three to crash Play death games with the Heart Suicide of body three Fighting life Pays with alternatives Gives me hope Basic movement motivates Departure from interaction Test me Baby with a chance to talk and share again to live again with you nearby Your memory lives on while you go elsewhere to other experiences other lives other lies Bring reality back to mind's games game To seamy back streets of silliness. 9 July 1990 Somewhere over Yosimite At 30,000 feet White billowing clouds Seemingly Soft and at Peace But underneath a storm rages Sleeping mother and child sets nearby The young one's eyes glisten with refreshing inquisitiveness Mind flashes, I see your face the clouds. And wonder what our next meeting will be like and our Future Circa 1981-82 Beaverton, Oregon When it hurts as bad as now I write away the pain Relief is not all I ache for happiness I long for you My ache goes deep Not sure if you and happiness are one Ached worse before and probably again But never after such a short span You are unique The trappings of the American Female gone No dresses, makeup or dinginess A woman of great finesse Flowing exactness embodied Loving, understanding, sympathetic, witty, moody, easily hurt, sensitive Oh I your body loved, But more your soul Your face aglow while even in pain Makes me want you more again A little herb, a little peace Makes your present mystical Your past past your future undetermined, together 15 July, 1990 Phoenix, AZ She talks of an unanticipated choice Emotional Death - To her own heart a saber struck With that she then be like the rest All emotionally dead talking in trivialities of nothingness But until then: Her heart is heavy but beats on Her soul is precious, her own Her choices are ever present and alive Her eyes fill with tears Her mouth quivers in fear of loneliness But she still feels She could become a robot She could ignore her heart She could run, hide to prevent sadness But: She could live in the present She could remain alive with future possibilities She could be happy with children calling her mother Suicide is a choice, but it ends the choice to choose- the most precious of all life's gifts. Take heart fair maiden, the dragons at your door do not want you dead. Respect your enemies, once conquered they become your friends. Your friend and lover awaits your choice in all patience. 20 Jul 1990 In her hand she has my heart Vulnerable but safe When she hurts, she squeezes And my heart pangs We are connected emotionally For her heart I hold too So much trust among friends Is scary, but beautiful. Saturday 21 july 1990 Phoenix Her moods like a pendulum swing Ecstatic joy, contentment, hurt, Dark hurt, contentment, joy. Like a jewel dancing in the breeze Each phase another facet displayed. If there be elegance in pain there is in her's. Exposed in sun's white glare Those with sight can see the sparkling perfection of rainbow light's flashing rays But when darkness comes A discerning eye it takes to understand the hurt therein. To understand her during those dark times can be precious, as a diamond glitter in the moonlight. Gooey, sweet sorrow, missing you weighs heavy on my soul, But anticipation of next week's meeting lightens that weight. Riskier now than previously, we now have more to loose, but also more to gain. Some say chivalry dead. I too accept such thoughts, But when I think of you, princess, chivalrous thoughts return. I want to be your knight, your protector, your provider, your hero. I must constrain myself as we are so alike our value comes as equal partners in life sharing joys, sorrows, and pain. As friends united toward common goals on life's path which at times a rocky road. Still in identification we explore whom the other be. Looking for flaws perhaps but mostly finding our common qualities. Someday in life's course our identification be done, what action then? We'll see! How soon? As a wide river takes its time exploring its banks and eventually reaches its destination, so too we will find our destination in time. I long to explore all your river's banks and learn how your pendulum swings. 1 Aug 90 Tucson With people all around, I'm alone without you. You flew into my life like a wandering butterfly but you've become my life's light and my heart's happiness. I sit here waiting for your call A bit insecure with my heart in your hand, But like a bee is addicted to honey, I am addicted to your love. Grey fiery storms paint the pastel evening sky. Dusk sets on a college town and Wednesday evening turns gradually into night as the town's lights begin to twinkle. 21 Aug 1990 While the sun beats down on my bare back Even in the early morning dawn Feet move unconsciously in rhythm To the sounds of jazz's piano I think of you and me and the possibility Your smile, your laugh, Your sad face, your tears, Your humor, your funny times, Your hurt, your sadness Flow through my head effortlessly My joy, my love feelings, My darkness, my anger My understanding, my passion, My confusion, my coldness Flows, but not as easily Our similarities, our partnership, Our differences, our conflicts, Our dreams, our children, Our nightmares, our loneliness Races through my brain unceasingly The Sun is not as high in the sky As it used to be The breeze blows cooler on my chest August is almost gone and September brings the promise of cooler days Fall comes even to Arizona Like the seasons cycle Our relation finds phases of its own Long Summer days give way to Fall's crispness Romantic infactuation replaced by a cooler reality Some far away places have summer all year round But most people choose to live in a more cyclic climes We have chosen a moderate emotional climate too Summer's enjoyment is enhanced by the knowledge of Winters coldness But when Summer comes first, it is hard to know what Winter will bring Winter will temper our relationship cracking it, or making it stronger Why do I feel we have survived winter's first freeze? Like my morning run When life's race done I wish to say, "That was a good one" And hope you can say the same.